After the closing, it was time to move the personal possessions reserved for the belligerent beneficiary. Once the estate rental property closed, there were no remaining assets to settle. Therefore, the closing completed the asset settlement phase of the estate. At this point, I thought it would be a good time to wrap up business with the belligerent beneficiary. As described in the article How to Handle a Belligerent Beneficiary, I sent an email to the belligerent beneficiary. The point of the email was to give the belligerent beneficiary one week to collect the reserved possessions, and that I would call the beneficiary to set the day of the exchange. After sending the email, I was hopeful that the belligerent beneficiary would accept the reserved personal possessions. Moreover, by accepting the personal possessions, the possessions reserved for the belligerent beneficiary would finally be removed from the estate.

Moving the Personal Possessions Reserved for the Belligerent Beneficiary

On May 14, 2013, I called the belligerent beneficiary as promised. The call finished quickly as we only scheduled the exchange for two days later. On May 16, 2013, before the belligerent beneficiary arrived, I moved all the possessions from the basement of the estate home to the garage. Soon after moving the possessions, the belligerent beneficiary arrived and backed the car into the garage. After parking the car, the belligerent beneficiary walked over to the possessions and started looking through them. The belligerent beneficiary stated, “I sure hope the shaving mug I gave your Uncle is in one of these boxes.”

“Your sister packed these boxes, so I am not sure what is in them. A lot of the stuff packed is from your Mother’s estate. Since I have no authority over your Mother’s possessions, your sister packed the possessions. However, I do know that the shaving mug you requested is not in there. I never found the mug,” I replied.

“Well, I will look through this stuff and get back to you if anything is missing,” said the belligerent beneficiary. 

After that response, we both finished loading the car, shook hands, and the belligerent beneficiary drove off. As the belligerent beneficiary drove away, I knew this exchange was not the end.

The Missing Shaving Mug

About a week passed with no word from the belligerent beneficiary. Then, on May 22, 2013, the belligerent beneficiary called complaining about the missing shaving mug. At first, the conversation started with frustration from the belligerent beneficiary. Since this was typical behavior from the belligerent beneficiary, I was able to keep my composure. However, after reminding the belligerent beneficiary that I mentioned the shaving mug was missing at the garage, the belligerent beneficiary became combative. After listening to one insult after another about my performance as executor, I firmly responded and gave the belligerent beneficiary one last ultimatum:

“If you want all the gifts you gave my Uncle since the time you knew him, then I want all the gifts my Uncle gave you for that same time period. My Uncle always kept a journal of the gifts he gave, so I know what you received as gifts. Once these gifts arrive at my door, I will buy you another shaving mug and personally deliver it to your door. Otherwise, be grateful for what you received and move on.“

After giving the ultimatum, the contentious conversation came to an end.

Shortly after the conversation, the belligerent beneficiary called my attorney. The belligerent beneficiary mentioned that I was too immature to continue administering the estate. About an hour after the confrontation, I called my attorney to warn about another possible harassment campaign. Apparently, I was too late. The attorney told me that the belligerent beneficiary called to complain about my immature behavior and that I am not fit to continue as executor. After listening to my explanation, the attorney felt nothing should happen, but we’ll wait it out.

Conclusion

For a few days, the belligerent beneficiary took the belligerence up a notch. However, the belligerence eventually died down with no consequence. After the squabbling finally ended, there was nothing left for the belligerent beneficiary to complain about. Therefore, the Battle of the Shaving Mug was the last I heard from the belligerent beneficiary throughout the rest of the administration. In the end, moving the possessions reserved for the belligerent beneficiary was a hostile task. However, there was now a clear path to closing this estate on time.

Was this article insightful? Do you agree with the way I handled the belligerent beneficiary when the conversation became combative? Can you think of a better way to handle the situation with the belligerent beneficiary? Share your thoughts or questions in the comment area below.